11 Signs Your Ex Has Moved On – Do You Know These?

It’s not wise hitting your head on a wall while thinking that you will break it. If you are 100% sure that your ex has moved on, then moving on would be better for you, too. Image courtesy of nenetus at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Would you like to know these 11 signs that your ex has moved on so that you can get over them easily?

If so, keep reading and discover whether they are still into you or not.

If you are in an on/off relationship, it is always confusing to know what is the right decision to take in your relationship. You might not want to lose the relationship.

On the other hand, you also know that you might not be able to be happy in that relationship.

You might try to get over your ex girlfriend or boyfriend, however when you find it difficult for you, you might start trying to get your ex back.

Anyway, when you become sure that your ex has moved on, there is no need to try again to get them back. You need to convince yourself that it’s over. And then, you should move on, too.

Now here are the 11 signs your ex has moved on from you.

1) No emotions towards you –

As long as your ex shows any type of emotions towards you, you have a chance of getting them back. No matter whether they show negative emotions such as hatred, you can still win them back as long as they have any emotions for you.

But when your ex becomes indifference, it is a sure sign that they have moved on. Now they don’t care about you and they don’t think about you (see more How to know if it’s time to breakup).

2) They always keep distant –

One of the sure signs that your ex has lost interest in you is that they always keep distant from you. You may try a lot to keep yourself closer to them, however, if they have moved on they always keep distant from you.

In this case, it may be possible that they act nice, however, they avoid personal talk and keep themselves away from you.

3) Don’t show interest on your texts –

If your ex has moved on, they don’t show any interest over your texts. And it doesn’t matter how much interesting your text was.

Sometimes, they don’t reply your texts and if they do reply to you, the response is either short or late. In all cases, however, they don’t show any interest on your texts.

4) They don’t consistently tell you that they are HAPPY –

If your ex is consistently telling you that they are happy with the breakup and they don’t want you back, then, rest assured that they are not happy. And they want you back badly. If they do this, it means they still care about you.

On the other hand, if they feel that there is no need to show you that they are HAPPY without you, it is a big sign that they have moved on.

People show their happiness with someone they care. If your ex seems not to care about expressing their HAPPINESS, then usually it indicates that they don’t have any feelings for you.

5) They don’t start talk with you –

It’s a very normal concept that the one who is interested in the other one always tries to initiate the talk with that person. In the starting of your relationship, you and your ex always tried to initiate talk with each other.

Now, after the breakup, if your ex never initiates any talk with you, then it is very safe to say that they have moved on.

6) They have involved into a new relationship –

Some people fall into rebound relationship, because they don’t want to experience the trauma of a breakup. And it very common that some people develop rebound relationships right after the breakups.

However, if your ex waited for a while and then they started dating someone else, then it is a sign that they are seeking a serious relationship, not a rebound relationship.

If they are seeking a serious relationship, then it is quite sure that they have recovered from the breakup. Now they don’t want to date someone just to make you jealous. As they are seeking serious relationship, they have moved on.

7) They are not regretful about the breakup –

We normally regret about any past event if it affects the happiness of the present life. This is the psychology of regret. A person normally doesn’t regret about his past misconduct if it isn’t affecting the happiness of his present life.

The same rule applies to your ex. If they don’t show any regret then it simply means that they have moved on – and you should, too.

8) They have deleted  you from their social media profiles –

In today’s world, people spend so much time on social media. This is a platform for them to express their emotions.

Therefore, if your ex has deleted you from their social profiles then they are actually declaring to their social network that they don’t want you back. If they are daring that much, then they are really not willing to restore the relationship.

Did your ex ‘unfriend’ you on Facebook? Did your ex stop following you on Twitter? Did your ex change their relationship status? If so, then this is another big sign that they have moved on.

9) Not calling your name –

When we fall in love with someone, we call the name of that person as many times as we can. However, when we don’t feel for someone, we don’t call their name often.

Usually we use general terms such as he, she, boy or girl for them.

Is your ex calling your name often? If not, they might not have any feelings for you.

10) Their body language demonstrate no interest in you –

Your ex doesn’t show any interest while you are telling something very interesting. Your ex starts yawning when you start talking. Your ex starts looking here and there while you start apologetic or simple talk with them. They do not either give you any answer or short answer.

If your ex shows all these things, then he or she has moved on.

11) They have already told you that they don’t feel for you as they did in the past –

If they have told you this at least twice, then you have no reason to hold on the relationship with them. They are over and you should be over them. That’s it.

Bonus tip –

If your ex shows all these signs and you still believe that they haven’t moved on, then the best thing to do is to contact them and confront it.

In my training material The Master Training Kit: How to Get Over Your Ex In in 14 Days I say that some people don’t get over their exes after years of sufferings because they still keep false hope that their ex will take them back.

You don’t want to keep false hopes for years and later, you discover that your ex has kids with someone else.

If your ex has any feelings for you, they will hardly say ‘no’ when you confront them. And if they confront it that they don’t want you back, then you don’t need to keep false hopes for a reunion. Getting over your ex will be much easier for you thereafter.

So, what you need to do right now?

First off, I congratulate you because you can breathe now. If you were happy in the relationship with your ex, then you would not have broken up. A breakup happens for a reason.

Now you are sure that your ex has moved on, then there is no need to dwell over past. You can’t get your ex back and you should not try to.

Now improve your social skills and then improve yourself. Know what you want from a relationship and then start taking dates. The key thing is you should know yourself better.

So what do you want next?

Get access to my course The Master Training Kit: How to Get Over Your Ex In 14 Days

Or

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About The Author

Alex J. Stevenson

Alex J. Stevenson isn't a PhD holder on psychology. However, he better understand how to use psychology in real life to forget an ex and feel good.   By doing so, he has helped thousands of men and women to get over their exes (see praise here).   If you've been struggling to get over your ex, get access to his training material The Master training Kit: How to Get Over Your Ex In 14 Days. He guarantees that you will recover from your breakup, or else your money will be refunded.

26 Comments

  • AKing

    November 17, 2015

    Interesting points. Nice read.

  • Liz

    November 25, 2015

    Thank you for the post!

  • Alex J. Stevenson

    December 6, 2015

    I am glad that you liked it. 🙂

  • Melita

    January 18, 2016

    Wow! I scored 10/11. Now it’s high time. Need to move on badly. Thanks for the article 🙂

  • Alex J. Stevenson

    January 24, 2016

    Thanks for your comment Metita. If you scored 10/11 then their is really not any need to waste your time and energy on getting your ex back.:-)
    I wish your get over your ex soon.

  • Alex J. Stevenson

    January 29, 2016

    You are most welcome! 🙂

  • Angry Ex

    February 10, 2016

    My ex did all that. I thought he hated me and was over me.
    I looked at his diary for the past 3 years and it turns out he was and still is very much in love with me. Apparently his ego wouldn’t allow him to talk to me, he would only show me anger each time I tried to approach him over the years.

    He was very much in love with me despite showing all signs of a man moving on. Too bad, his stupid ego didn’t stop my pain because I’m not interested in stopping his pain right now

    Good thing once you release these old loves, better true love arrives, believe it and it will come. Have faith. My true love arrived and I have my ex to thank for it. Had he contacted me, I would have been with him instead of my new King.

    The best is yet to come fellow heartbroken people.

  • Alex J. Stevenson

    February 12, 2016

    Hi Angry Ex 🙂

    Thanks for sharing your story here. I am sure that your advice will also help others who are struggling to get over an ex.

  • Vicki Horan

    June 14, 2016

    I’m married to my husband he has cheated on me he has blocked me, and he didn’t give me my half credit. He owes me. I’m suppose to get my stuff and he told me he got another phoned it’s going be a blocked number and he was suppose arrange to get my stuff out of there. We were go marriage counselling, he chose her over me. He’s had a lot relationship. I’m pregnant with his child now I’m sleeping a lot. He’s avoiding me and not communicating me. He should be doing that what do I do?

  • Alex J. Stevenson

    June 14, 2016

    Hi Vicki,

    I am sure that all these things weren’t happen in one day. Things were going from bad to worse for a long time.

    As you both were went for marriage counselling, your counselor would better understand both of you. As for as I can see that he has cheated on you multiple times, you would introspect whether it is worth trying to save your marriage or not.

    What will be happen after 5 years from now if you both are still together? Will he still give you respect and appreciation of a wife? Or will he dump you for another ones?

    Are you still with your husband because you think that no one appreciate you except your husband? If so, you need to learn why we fall in love with someone.

    Being pregnant with someone’s child is a sensational issue. However, when you are searching for the information on signs to know whether your partner has moved on or not, then you need to analyze your current circumstance more logically.

    Good Luck!

  • Blaming himself

    July 5, 2016

    Hi Alex, Hope I can get some insights.. I am so lost.. I feel I’m the one to blame and then I lost the love of my life because of my stupid insecurity..

    My Story is long, hope you’ll be able to get through it! 😉

    Hope I can get good insights.. Was with my Ex, we met through my best friend who was sick at the hospital.. they knew each other about 3 months before me, work together and becaue ‘friends’ she was at the hospital every time she could for him.. to the point that his mom said that my Ex might have begun to feel closer to him.. developing feelings. My Ex-girlfriend comes from a hard past, lived for 15 years with a Narcissist EX. It took her 2 years to get away with the help of her therapist.. but now I begin to wonder if she doesn’t have symptoms that.. she might be controlling, selfish and narcissist traits..)

    Ok so the first two months, honeymoon phase, all is going well.. I was at my best and she craved me! Then, one night, went to dinner with my “best friend” that’s working with her and they have meetings every 3 months that they sleep in hotels, for work colleagues only 🙁

    He asked me how things are going: I said wonderful and happy! Instead of being happy for me, he told me: you are lucky to have her. If I had slept with her last time at our meeting that she was so drunk that she passed out, you wouldn’t be with her today. (I was like: WTHeck??)

    I said: but there is another woman with you at the same time to help her get into her bed: he told me: you know how easy it is to tell her to go and that I’ll take care of her..(so for me, if she was too drunk, it would be a rape! 🙁 I couldn’t believe all that crap that came all of a sudden from my BEST FRIEND!) I asked him why he told me all of this crap! he answered that he didn’t know. (??)

    He had a GF at the time, but it wasn’t going well, I asked him if he was jealous of my happiness, he told me no.. so..

    From that point on.. I became Anxious, insecure, paranoid every time they went to their meetings every 3 months.. My GF tried to reassure me: he’s not my type (when my friend’s mother told him she began to feel interested), you’re the one that I’m with.
    When we were at the hospital and I told him I’m interested to know about her, he was like: but she’s not your type, she’s got a big ass! I said I don’t care, he said: she has 2 kids!! I said I don’t care..

    The question is: why did he told me all of this, if he knew that I would react badly.. and he knows me for 20 years, so he know by telling me thing, I would start to freak out!

    To the point that my GF, even if they never slept with each other? (I will never know) she was at the receiving end and she never deserved that I changed from secure to insecure. So now, every 3 months, there was an awful week where I was pouting, not telling her to have a good time, even if I was thinking it, and she began to resent me.. we lasted 16 months. Some says she has issues with her past, avoidance and emotionnally unavailable, but maybe she closed herself because I became insecure? (behind my back, I learned she was confiding in him instead of me even before that event happened) but I know I’m the one who let myself to be vulnerable to the one I trusted the most, and became corrupted by these thoughts he said to me, which still as of today, I’m trying to find the answers.. To close that chapter.

    My EX-GF told me to consult, and I did. (she’s the first woman that made me want to do it! Because I knew she was worth it!)

    Thing is.. we then had 2 different therapist, which we should have gotten only one. She let go of me, didn’t support me through this event!! Because her own Psychologist told her if she were to support me through this, she would have to take anti-depressant pills! 🙁 so of course the choice is evident, and I felt I was having a relationship with her therapist more than her at some point..

    So yeah, it’s easy between the 2 choices given, to let go of the person you love.

    I never wanted to have trust issues, I had trust into her, but if she was drunk over there, I didn’t trust my Best friend.. I became so lost into all of this, I couldn’t believe I became that insecure.. and.. I snooped over her, she gave me her password for her accounts when things started to get sour after 2 months, as proof that she has nothing to hide, I gave her mine, she refused because she trusted me.. so.. in order to show her I trust her, I never checked.. until she let me go the first time.

    At some point during the relationship, I asked her to see her phone, and.. she became very defensive, saying that even if I didn’t find anything, she would feel it’s a breach of trust.. so.. she got me there, I didn,t check.. Instead of being open and transparent with me, which would have reassured me.. and she changed her cell phone password and went to the toilet with her phone, not answering in front of me when someone was calling..

    In the end she was more and more distant, on her phone, secretive, smiling when receiving text, she was giving love to her dad and daughters, even the cat had cuddles and got love more than me, she knew what I wanted and she blatantly didn’t give it to me, as a form of control or vengeance for resenting me losing myself and not being the secure guy anymore?

    – Am I the one at fault here? That is my biggest question..

    Then I saw their conversation, and at some point my best friend told her everything I was telling her! So I confirmed some stuff.. we went back together after 3 weeks, I saw she was checking other man on Facebook.. when she told me she wanted exclusivity even if we are not together.. (that was weird)

    Nevertheless, she was testing me to see if I changed, stopped being insecure.. but since she didn’t invest herself 100% for the second time (she said no more text messages, calla, surprise visit are a no-no, we will see each other only once per week), I knew something was off, and I was still insecure..

    So guess what.. I failed her test of taking things slowly.. and I regret it! Now that I’m back to myself, I really want to prove her that the changes are real this time around.. but I fear she moved on and do not want anything from me, as she found out that I was checking her accounts. I never used a proxy or VPN to hide I was checking.

    Then she said she could never trust me again. All the time together, she gave me the silent treatment, stonewalling, I tried to make her open, but she was closed. she knew it would drive me nuts, so yeah, I’m not the only one guilty of this toxic relationship, but.. I still have in my mind the:

    – What if my best friend would have never told me this, today we would still be happy together.. *the first time she left me, he was mad at her.. saying she abused of me, was a taker and loved all the attention I gave to her since she didn’t get any from her Narcissist ex.. (I gave her lots, massages, gifts, trips, cuddling, compliments, and that’s how I am when in love, I’m not asking for her to give me the same amount but.. she reciprocated 10% of the time, sometimes not even a thank you, taking me for granted)

    He said to move on, that she won’t take me back.. (what this part of his plans to break us up so he could go with her? Am I just making these scenarios because of the fear when he said he would sleep with her but my EX-GF told me that she never slept with anyone else than me..) but she did come back! So I don’t know what’s she’s thinking and saying, it seems 2 different things..

    My sister talked to her lately, and.. she told my sister that she would be ready to work things out if, after a few months, I could show her that I’ve changed, because she still loves me and she’s attracted to me.. but my best friend talk to her about it, and.. she answered that my sister took it the wrong way, and that she never wanna see me or talk to me again.. Really, I don’t know what to think of it. (who to trust in here! why my best friend is acting that way, he said all he told her seems congruent, when I deliberately prove him otherwise more than once!)

    I wish I could show her the real me, secure, without my best friends between us 2 (he was her confident as well..)

    So, I saw that she rearranged all her furniture, the bed is not at the same place, she thew out everything that made her think of me, including the blue rose that I gave her, she kept it even after the 1st breakup, but now, the 2nd chance that I failed.. she threw it out, as if she thinks I will never change and it’s time for her to give up hope and move on.. deep inside I know she’s an awesome woman, and that all she was asking is for me to stay strong no matter what’s happening.. and then she would have open up and let herself go, because she felt vulnerable in the past, and.. she wanted it to work very much with me.

    *Since I tried to communicate with her, and it was hurting her to see my name on her cell phone, she send me a Warning Notice to stop contacting her.. :'(

    *I met her 3 days ago, she came to me so she used her usual double standard: don’t worry, I went to talk to you, not the opposite, so don’t worry..

    We talked, she said: do you really believe me and your friend slept together? She laughed. She said: You’re the only one I slept with. As well, I love you 100% but my way of expressing it to you, and your way of interpret it made it so that you didn’t feel loved enough and that I couldn’t do anything to convince you of my love..

    (That’s why I feel I’m to blame, that she’s an angel and that I was not able to see it because of my friend’s fears implanted.. *a friend should have been happy for my relationship right?)

    – Should I hang on to a possible “third chance” in months to come, like she mentioned it was too quick for our 2nd chance, maybe if it was at the end of the summer..

    But since I cannot contact her, how can this be possible..

    I don’t know what to think..

    I’ve cut the story, thanks for your reading and inputs are more than welcome!

    Thank you very much for your time.

  • Alex J. Stevenson

    July 6, 2016

    Hi,

    I read full story, and it reminded me my old days. 🙂

    If everything your wrote here is right, then I doubt that she had slept with your friend. When I went through your story, I found that you had so many misconceptions about love and relationship which were ruining your life.

    In my training material The Master Training Kit: How to Get Over Your Ex In 14 Days, I show my customers how to judge whether they should try for a second chance or not if their partner has cheated on them. I also tell the psychology of cheaters and why they become cheaters.

    As you said that you had taken consultancy of a counsellor, I doubt the ability of the counsellor because if he was a good one, you didn’t have to suffer a lot thereafter.

    However, it seems that you are still suffering a lot, it means that your counsellor didn’t did their work properly.

    Lastly, if I were you, I wouldn’t try for a third chance because breakups happens for a reason. If you both were happy together, you didn’t separated. And you both wouldn’t have to see counsellors to help you to forget each other.

    Your story grabbed my extra attention, therefore I also sent you a personal message. Please check it. 🙂

  • Kurtis

    July 10, 2016

    Hi Alex, me and my ex were together for 11 months. 9 months were very good but the last 2 months we had trust issues and always fought.

    My ex only shows number 5 on the list and that’s because I would constantly beg for her back so she would assume I would text her but it’s been 16 days since I last contacted her.

    When I said that I was seeing someone else, she got all emotional and she would always tell me to move on.

    She found a guy on tinder (lives 40 mins away) and I think it’s a rebound because they started talking 10 days after our break up but they are both going off to school after summer living 1 hr 15 mins away.

    I was thinking of not contacting her until 1 month into school which would be 3 months total for no contact. Any advice would be great!

  • Alex J. Stevenson

    July 14, 2016

    Hi Kurtis,

    As she had already told you to move on, you should not keep false hope to get her back. Moreover, she has already got someone new, what else you need to know that she doesn’t feel for you.
    If you were not a priority to her while you both were in a relationship, you will not become a priority to her while she already has another option.

    In my opinion, it is better to move on rather than trying to get her. Even if you get her back, you will not get her for life. 🙂

  • Stacey

    July 19, 2016

    Hi Alex,

    Me and my ex were together for over a year and a half. My ex-boyfriend broke up back in March – he ended it because he said long distance was too difficult and he said that he wanted to be with me all the time.

    I literally had just got back home from being with him for two months straight when he ended it.

    After the breakup, he still contacted me (he was almost always the first one to initiate contact and almost everyday) then after his birthday, all contact stopped.

    We hadn’t spoken for a month until yesterday, when I found out he has been dating this new girl… who lives in ANOTHER COUNTRY.

    He said they had met at a bar and instantly clicked, he also slept with her. But when we got together, we were still talking – he’d tell me he still loves me, how amazing I was and how he missed me.

    Now when I found out, he told me it’s different with her and he doesn’t need to be in constant communication all the time though he told me a part of him will always love me.

    He claims to like the privacy as they don’t talk much throughout the day. He told me that she already bought her ticket to come see him in January. What should I think of this? How can I move on from this? Any advice would be great 🙂

  • Alex J. Stevenson

    July 27, 2016

    Hi Stacey

    I am sorry about your situation. As your question is much related to your ex boyfriend, I have not enough to say. The details your provided here is not enough for me to come to any conclusion about your ex.

    I suggest you to see a counselor, they would better help you.

    As far as what I see from your story is your ex likes you, however there is something he deeply wanted from the relationship and you were not able to provide that thing to him.

    It may be Respect, Appreciation or any physical attractiveness quality. He met another girl and it seems that she was meeting some of those qualities he was looking at you.

    If you try to win him back (and actually win him back) but you are unable to provide those things (qualities) to him, then there are possibilities that he might cheat on you again in future.

    To understand this concept better, read my lasted article ‘Why do we fall in love with someone’ on this website.

  • Sanrda

    August 1, 2016

    hi Alex

    me and my ex were together for 9 years, we have a 8 year old son together. we lived together also half of those years.but we broke up 2 years ago, i asked him to move out because our relationship was draining me emotionally, we started have problems long time ago when he started cheating on me when i was pregnant with my son and then i felt like he didnt love me anymore, but we manager to resolve our issues and got back together after couple of months.the problem that we had was the fact he was not working and i’m the one who was supporting our family and i supported him emotionally, financially in the name of love but i still felt unappreciated. i even decided to buy a house for us so that we could have a home for our kids, after we got a house we were both excited about it but that’s were the problems began. he finally manage to get a job but never contributed in the house financial and which i needed him to go, i believed as the head of the house that is his responsibility to do so but he constantly reminded me that this is not his house therefore he will use his money to upgrade his car.

    even after everything he put me through i still love him and hoped we could work it out one day, i guess i also wanted to have kids with the same father. i did date couple of guys after the break up but i still couldn’t let go of him i don’t know if this is me being stupid or what?

    couple of days ago, i asked him if we could try again and he said no, he has moved on with his life and his still love me its just that things couldn’t work out between us.even though he keeps on moving from one girl to the other and told his friends that i broke his heart.

    i just want to know if its really time for me to close that chapter of my life and start afresh. please help

  • NotOverHer

    August 2, 2016

    I scored a 2.5 to 3 at best.
    Can you help me with this.
    Together for 3 years.
    She broke up with me.
    Reasons:
    I became lazy, complacent, letting my hygien slide, always wearing the same outfits(shorts flipflops, not dressing up when we went out), I was not following through on our plans to get our own place together, not saving money not finding a better job, became a push over to her will, too nice, never calling her on bullshit just letting it slide. I lost my drive my ambitions, jealousy.
    Shes very drivin, very ambitious.

    So she broke up over these things with me.

    I started to change some of those things I said above.
    Gave me another chance a week later,after a very well written letter that I dictated to her in person.
    After our first re-date(which was fantastic) I sent something about facebook friends she was talking to and she thought I was being jealous, and broke it off again.
    This all happened in june.

    After the second breakup.
    I reflected on her reasons alot more, I reflected on myself. These changes I needed to make for myself, she was correct. I mean who wants to date a guy with those attributes? Nobody. I didnt used to have them. They developed over time with her, I got too comfortable.

    Over a 4 week period I changed all of these things about myself. Not for her mind you, but because what if she doesnt come back to me romantically ever? Well Iv made myself better for the next woman.

    I said lets be friends, she said she doesnt think that I want to be just friends, I said, what we had is gone, I understand it and acccept it…well in a way she was right…in a way she was wrong, see I cannot give up. At least not until I know that everthing is not re-obtainable…and I dont know that it is or isnt at this point. Iv been able to get over all my ex’s pretty fast…not this one, she means too much to me, in the begining I put so much effort towards her. She has changed me…I think for the better.

    Stopped contact for awhile. about a week. Over the next four weeks(while making these changes) we starting texting back in forth more. I normally intiated it, but she would on occasion start something too. But she would always converse with me when I started it, sometimes one word answeres, sometimes paragraphs.(this is why I said .5 of a point)

    We went out on a “friend date” she called it an “outing” to the movies last night. I was confident, smiling, I made her laugh, we talked about things, she talked about things, I did about 65% of the talking,opened the doors for her, dressed nice, smelled good(some of the things she wanted me to do in the first place, things I used to do but stopped)… we watched a horror movie,she would touch me to make me jump, Id do the same, she did it in the car ride home as well. Fun times.
    NIght ended with a big hug, several actually. she said she had a good time I said the same, asked her if she wanted to do something next saturday, she thought about and said yes.
    Texted me “its in the back of your car!!” with emotacons while I was driving home.

    I know you coach how to get over your EX, but at the same time maybe you would have some insite on resparking this, or at least trying.

    We are supposed to go hang out again this saturday, go clothing shopping for college, maybe have a late lunch, or early dinner..not sure.

    I want her back, but I dont want the old us back, I want a new us back. Something better. I want it to develope organically, and only ask her out on a real date if I have to. I believe I can offer her that now, and I want her to see it, and she has seen it.
    What do you think I should do?

  • David

    August 2, 2016

    Alex,

    I have been married 30 years. My W dropped the bomb one year ago that she has no feelings for me, does not love me and wants a divorce. She said that she had pretended to love me for 11 years for the sake of our kids. Her love went away 11 years ago because of career/financial challenges I had then and how I treated her (not like a partner; also that I refused to see a counselor (thinking it was a waste of time). The ensuing 11 years found us drifting apart until 2011 when she began a 2 yr affair with the next door neighbor. They were discovered and she confessed to me in 2013. I forgave her and began in earnest to repair our marriage. Thought I was doing a good job too. In June of last year I had new career challenges and caused me to briefly return to past behaviors toward my W. That combined with the discovery that her elderly Mom was being treated emotionally badly by her Dad…was the last straw and she said she was done with me. Since I have tried everything I know to be a better me (counseling, priest, self help books and courses). Throughout have tried to treat her with kindness and love…made very difficult as she treated me without care and little compassion, anger and of late indifference. I have tried to “Let Her Go” 3 times but keep coming back as I do not believe in divorce and pray that she will change her mind. My wife has assures me there is not another man. She says she is at peace and has moved on. I find myself struggling with “how could she be at peace when she has caused so much pain to me (which she does not care for anyway) to our 4 young adult kids; our families and our friends. I truly love her and strongly believe we could create a new marriage together that we both would find rewarding. She has done nothing to help me try to save our marriage. Arggh…it is so painful. All of this so she can be ‘happy’ and live an ‘authentic lif’…whatever that is.

  • Nina

    August 8, 2016

    We know its never gonna happen between us, we started as “we will give a chance to make some good memories” after a month, we both got so attached I fell in love with him, I told him, he asked for time to think about it, he says he loves me but not sure about me.

    Later we got trust issues, he is not believing me anymore. I moved out from that place, I miss him badly, he is not talking with me, but I’m truly in love with him, I’m unable to move on, I cant forget him. 🙁

  • Sahil

    October 2, 2016

    Hi Alex, I have read this article and I’m little lost and depressed these days. Hope you can help by reading my story. I’ll try to make it brief.

    I had a long distance relationship for 5 years. Everything was going great. We talked every day for about 5-6 hours. Face Time was also used once or twice in a week. She used to care for me a lot and supported me a lot.

    She can’t see tears in my eyes as well. She was an emotional type of person. We haven’t met for 3 years and before the breakup her family was planning to come to my country as they have a home here so we were going to meet after 3 years.

    But somehow things weren’t our ways and the program got cancelled. And after few weeks, she declared that she don’t have feelings for me and I was shocked and surprised. After this, I made her realise everything.

    Tried to make her understand and convinced her with almost everything and this had gone 2 months regular. We had good times and bad times in this phase as well. But everytime she claims that she don’t feel anything for me. I tried to convince her that to meet me once and gave plans but she said that she don’t want to come.

    After 2 months from the breakup, last week she made her final choice by saying that she is finally leaving me and has blocked me from every thing so that I can’t contact her anymore. Even her sister also blocked me from every platform.

    Next day I sent her mails, begging her, requesting her and you know showing all my weakness by expressing myself that I am almost dead and all. The reply from the other side really shocked me like hell.

    She said that she don’t want me anymore, she is feeling light now, 5 years meant nothing for her, made a best decision and will not regret, will file a case and ruin your future if I sent her messages again for harassing, hating me and the fact that she loved me once, criticizing every moment.

    I still was calm and not used bad words. She insulted me in almost every message but I didn’t.

    After one week, again I tried and the reaction was same that she is happy now and she don’t care about me and my life.

    I’m so much depressed by all this that why she showed me this much hate all of a sudden and even I approached her sister and she is also not willing to talk. I want to find out that if she is in love with someone else or not and I don’t know how to do that.

    I’m very much lost these days. Please help me with something how to find out or something else. I still love her badly and want her back but I know there is no hope and she is not ready to unblock me.

    I’m a emotional person and I’m not able to handle this thing and can’t understand the fact of loosing her. If we were together this wouldn’t have happened she claimed once.

    I want to meet her but I don’t think she will meet me or not. Can you please tell me that what is this going on and why she hated me in the end and my life doesn’t mattered for her. Please read this Alex and help me through this.
    Thank you.

  • Alex J. Stevenson

    November 27, 2016

    Hi David,

    I read your comment, and I can understand your situation. I would like to quote this line:

    “She has done nothing to help me try to save our marriage.”

    David, this is what you think and this is not WHAT SHE THINK. Normally, we give more value to our own perspective, and we neglect the fact that other one may have a different perspective.

    If she has find another one, then the situation is really tough. I would suggest you to seek a counselor, he would better guide you whether to move on or hold on.

    However, if you have made your decision to move on then you can Try The Master Training Kit. It won’t cost you much.

    Good Luck!

  • Stephen

    March 15, 2017

    I gave my girlfriend everything all my love, my heart, my body, my soul and she hurt me over and over again till I finally had enough. I left her but after a short while I discovered she’s with someone else and it was tearing me apart that i could not endure it but to find a solution which i did by contacting a man named Dr.Mack by his email address dr.mac@yahoo. com, after 3 days, my relationship was resolved, my girlfriend is mine again and she is never gonna leave again, i am so excited
    Stephen. Louisiana

  • ian

    April 12, 2017

    intresting article.

  • Liam

    April 12, 2017

    Hi Alex,

    Broke up with ex about 4 months ago now- it was her decision over a petty argument.

    She still gets very emotional towards me, last week when I was at a bar when I went to get drinks she went over to my best friend to chat to him about me. She brought up our past and like shit talked me to him.
    She will also say things to him like “Just so you know I’ve seen two people since Liam” She’s also brought up to me several times how her brother showed her my snapchat story of me with another girl.

    Also whenever we are in the same bar she gradually works her way over until she is stood really close to me. I’ve even had other girls now tell me they don’t want to flirt/dance with me etc cos they don’t want to ruin her night.

    Then she will text me wanting to argue over nothing really. I will tell her to leave it and she will continue to bring up the past and get angry. She gets mad if I ignore her and her brother will text me. But she always ends the chat with, I’m happy; I’ve moved on, I don’t care, please leave me alone even though she text me then will block me.

    I would say she is the opposite of 1-5, 7, 9, 10 and wanted to hear your thoughts on this?

  • Meg

    April 14, 2017

    Hi
    My ex broke up with me 10 days ago out of the blue he said he didn’t think we communicate in the right way which is a shock because we talk everything through
    His last message to me was I love you more than I allowed myself to show ! I know he is under a lot of stress he has fallen out with his family and has left his job and said he needs to work on getting himself straight and that he wants to be the best person he can be for me but I don’t know if I believe that since we split his whatsapp is on fire from early morning till well literally early morning never has been that way before I think he may be talking to other girls well that’s what my guy tells me anyway
    I started nc
    And yesterday he messaged saying he still loves me and misses me and soon he would like to come and see me
    But then gave me a list of things he really doesn’t like about me wth !
    He said I need to work on these things apart from them he is happy and he thought we got along fine
    Ok it was only 4 things but hell a list !!
    I’m so hurt by the way he left we had made plans for the future and a lot more I’m just so confused xx

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