If you want to learn how to get over being dumped then the first thing you need to understand is it is okay to feel bad right after being dumped.
I know that you want to change your past and you are haunted by your past relationship.
Whenever you want to sleep, bad memories come to your mind and make you feel bad and regretful.
You think that you’re not a good person therefore your ex dumped you.
You think that if you were a good person, you would have found someone else as your ex has found a new partner.
There are so many irrational thoughts which make you believe that you are worthless. In other words, you find yourself as an unworthy person. Don’t you?
In this post, I will share some tips based on psychology which will help you getting over being dumped.
Tip #1. The first and biggest step is to FIX YOUR EGO –
I find that some people don’t love their partner that much. They stay on a relationship which makes them feel unhappy all the time. However, when their partner dumped them they feel really bad just because it hurts their ego.
To make it more convincing, I would like to tell you a story about Marcus.
Marcus is a guy who recently completed his college. Most of his colleagues have got jobs. At this time, he needs a job, too.
He submits his resume to various companies, and finally one company asks him for an interview.
But there is one problem with company. They are offering far less salary than what Marcus expected. Despite this, Marcus goes for the interview.
Unexpectedly, Marcus gets rejected from the job interview. Do you think Marcus will feel really bad thereafter? Of course, Marcus will.
Marcus won’t feel bad because he needs that job so much or he can accomplish all his dreams by getting that job.
He will feel bad just because a ‘rejection’ hurts his ego. He may think that his degrees are worthless that’s why he didn’t get the job.
The same thing happen when someone is being dumped in a relationship.
They think that they are being dumped because they lack something. And it kills their self esteem.
So what you need to do right now?
Do the below things:
- Accept that you didn’t want your ex that much.
- If your ex has got someone new then believe that his or her partner doesn’t need to be better than you. Understand the psychology of falling in love.
- You can forget your ex by fixing your hurt ego.
Tip #2. Understand the psychology of forgiveness –
I have seen many sites where authors say that one should forgive one’s ex in order to get over being dumped. However, they don’t tell how to forgive an ex and move on.
Some others say that one should repeat phrases like “I forgive my ex” daily and then one should be able to forgive one’s ex.
None of those understand the psychology of forgiveness. You know that forgiving your ex in not that easy. If it would be easy, you would not be here.
Forgiveness won’t happen as long as you are on the weak position.
In order to forgive someone and move on, you have to be in the strong position. Confused? Let’s talk about these two scenarios.
Scenario 1. You are arguing with someone. Suddenly, he slaps on your cheek. Thereafter, he makes fun of you. You want to beat him but you find that he is enormous and can’t be beaten.
You are unable to do anything. You come back home and try to forget this event by forgiving him.
Scenario 2. You are a Master in Martial Arts. You know how to beat 10 bullies at the same time even if they seem bigger than you.
Now the same person comes and slaps on your cheek. This time you just push him and tell him, “I am merciful today. Go away or else I will beat you badly.”
Remember that you don’t do anything thereafter.
So, in which scenario forgiving that person would be easier for you?
Of course, it is in the second scenario because you are in the strong position than someone who hurts you.
So what does this have to do with how to get over being dumped?
The brutal truth is you are now in the weak position and your ex is in the strong position. Your ex was someone who broke up with you. Maybe your ex girlfriend or boyfriend does so for someone else. And that is putting you in the weak position and making you feel being dumped.
So what you need to do right now?
The answer is Be In The Strong Position. Prove your ex that they were wrong by dumping you. Make them feel that they lost a treasure that is you.
Be happy without them and show them that you are living a happy life without them.
Improve yourself and raise your standard. Make efforts to achieve the goals you have been neglecting for a long time.
Once you do all this, let it know to your ex. Your feeling of ‘being dumped’ will go away and you will be proud of yourself. This is how psychology works (see more How to let go of a toxic relationship).
Tip #3. Be Fortunate for what you have –
You might think that you life is unfair to you, therefore I want you to watch below video. You don’t need to watch it completely. If you watch first one minute, that’s enough.
So what about you? How are you feeling right now? I am eagerly waiting your comments below in this post :-).
How to get over being dumped by a narcissist
Getting over being dumped by a narcissist is a little different from normal breakup.
however, once you understand the psychology of narcissim, you won’t feel bad that much.
On the other hand you will be pity about your ex partner :-).
A narcissist is someone who thinks that HE KNOWS EVERYTHING. He believes that he is omnipotent. He is superior to all other.
He deserves to suppress everyone. And everyone should praise him for his so-called glorious past achievements. Moreover, he achieved those so-called glorious achievements by his extra ordinary efforts and so on.
Relationship with a narcissist can’t be successful unless the other person loves to be submissive all time.
If your partner was a narcissist, then you should feel good because if they didn’t break the relationship, you would have to suffer a little more time with them.
My ex girlfriend was a narcissist. She believed that she knew everything. She was a leader in her colleagues. And if sometimes she was unable to control someone, she became emotional. Then she tried to control that person by emotional manipulation :-).
So, how to get over being dumped by a narcissist?
A narcissist is not like a normal person. He (or she) has more emotional wounds. And they always try to heal those wounds by appearing superior.
Do you know why a narcissist always talks about his extra ordinary achievements?
Because he doesn’t feel worthy. He needs someone who can praise him so that he can feel worthy.
On a superficial vision, a narcissist seems to be a super confident person. But he isn’t.
Why does he always want to be praised? Because he feels worthless. Unless someone praise him or at least not oppose him while he brags, he can’t feel good about himself.
This is the key reason why you might not have a normal relationship with a narcissist unless you always want to be suppressed.
In other words, if you are a normal or ambitious person then you might not have a good time with a narcissist.
If your ex was a narcissist, then follow these steps to get over being dumped.
- Understand that they were someone who needed treatment, not you.
- You should be pity about them, because they might not be able to understand what you have understood about them.
- If you want to take revenge from a narcissist, then just tell them that they are unable to do a certain thing with an insulting tone. They will be mad to prove you wrong by doing that thing. Moreover, they won’t resist themselves to stop thinking about you.
- On the contrary to popular belief, a narcissist is not someone who is super confident. They are someone who doesn’t consider themselves as worthy, as long as they don’t brag about themselves.
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